There were advantages to being tall, Giles reflected, as he glanced
down the corridor, past Cordelia and her comet-trail of heavenly
bodies, and picked out Xanderâs dark head unerringly amongst six just
as dark.
And it certainly didnât hurt to have a calling that taught you how to
observe and remember what you saw, not when it meant that you could lie
sleepless and people the darkness with a dozen choice memories, then
spin them three steps further, so that Xander didnât just offer you
that donut, he straddled your lap and fed it to you, sticky piece by
sticky piece, and he didnât just bend to pick up a carelessly dropped
book, he stayed kneeling, properly penitent, and waiting for a finger
to tap against his lips, followed a moment later by -
Xander walked past him with a flickering, upward glance that never came
close to being an acknowledgement Giles even existed, because he was
with someone cool, and Giles bit his lip and wished heâd stayed in the
faculty room just a minute longer.
He heard footsteps behind him as the bell drove the students from his
path in an eye blink and Xander appeared, following him into the
deserted library. “Sorry, Giles. Didnât mean to blow you off. Iâm a
jerk.”
“It doesnât matter.” Giles forced a smile.
“Yes, it does. It hurt your feelings, didnât it?”
Giles shrugged. “You really donât have to worry -”
A kiss, clumsy, off-target and over too soon, landed on the corner of
his mouth, where he couldnât decide if it was meant for his cheek or
his lips.
“Kissed them better,” Xander said, flushing hotly and grinning,
vibrating on the spot with nerves and anticipation.
Giles nodded. “You did,” he said quietly. “Thank you.”
And he never changed that memory, though it ended there as Xander
backed away, still smiling, and hurried to class; never polished it and
improved it, never edited it, though he wore it thin with handling.
If he kept it imperfect, he was never in danger of thinking it wasnât
real.
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