It's Good For The Roses

This was a challenge fic on alt.tv.buffy-v-slayer.creative, set by Andy. The phrase, “Don’t forget the shovel” had to be included and preferably the shovel was not to be used as a weapon or to bury a body. Length; more than a drabble, less than a fic.


The visitor looked at the door, his head cocked to one side, a puzzled frown on his face. Coming to a decision, he raised a mighty fist and tapped gently. The hinges were torn from the frame and the door slowly fell inwards, landing with a thud that shook the house.

The demon blushed scarlet with shame.

The Slayer came out of the cloud of dust and studied him, foot tapping impatiently. "Yes?" she said, her tone terse.

"Good morning, madam. I apologise for the little accident. I am selling door to door to finance my spawn’s higher education. Would you be interested in -"

"A new door? Yes I would."

The demon gaped at her, his tusks glistening in the sunlight. "But, but, I cannot afford such luxuries!"

"A door isn't a luxury! Though for all the good it does keeping people out, it might as well not be there, I agree. You broke it, you pay for it. Now."

The demon decided that no human was pushing him around. Peaceable by nature, his fighting ancestors rose up to demand that he crush this puny mortal. Growling ferociously, he raised his hands and advanced on her.

Two minutes later he glanced down in horror and began to run bow legged down the path.

Spike and a crowd of Potentials, attracted by the noise, came running to find Buffy dusting off her hands, a militant expression on her face.

"What happened?" gasped Molly.

Spike peered over Buffy's shoulder. "Looks like we had a visit from an Erunam demon."

Molly wrinkled up her nose and pointed. "Is that him?"

Spike chuckled. "Nah. He's long gone, I wager. Looks like Buffy scared the shit out of him."

She nodded and said briskly. "Kennedy? Your turn to do clean up. Go put on some rubber gloves."

"But I shouldn't have to do a job like that!" Kennedy protested. "I'm, like, your second in command!"

Buffy gave her a steady look. "Kennedy?"

"Yes?"

"Don't forget the shovel."



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